Monday, December 27, 2021

Some Higher Plan

 



Some Higher Plan 


That liquor cabinet 

above the refrigerator 

was what I chained and locked- 

the place for those nights 

when someone can’t sleep,

when there’s a toothache to endure 

a celebration to cheer 

a cough to suppress -

because I thought it might be 

too tempting for some


That jewelry chest 

here in the rural Georgia countryside 

-where we don’t always 

even lock our doors-

was never on the chain and lock list 


That safe under the stairs 

contains only emergency cash

 (enough to drive to maybe Canada)

passports

papers 


That family jewel theft 

was not on the radar, 

even by the yet unknown 

disease that drove it 


Who among us could 

trust and love 

live life to the fullest 

being that suspicious 

of our own?


I suppose it’s always easier 

looking back,

after the fact,

asking through tears 

about the loss of precious things

what might have been done

to protect them


The friend who lost a son

several years ago 

and all her belongings 

in a house fire this year 

tells others, 

“They say those vaults are fireproof. 

They’re not.”

Remaining photos of a son 

gone too soon

    charred images

      smoldering in “safe” walls~

and through it all, she keeps 

unwavering faith in God 

to take, 

       to give, 

           to work through her.


I strive for that same peace.


As tornadoes 

ravaged Kentucky 

a week before Christmas 

a Facebook friend 

posted pictures 

shared of the loss of

her generational family farm-

the barns, 

      the cattle, 

           the equipment, 

                the fences.

“We will be relying 

on the wisdom 

and strength 

of our Savior 

as we get through this,” she 

wrote through tears, 

not knowing where to 

even begin. 


Human hands. 

Fire. 

Tornadoes. 


Destruction. 

Betrayal. 

Tears. 

Hurt. 

Precious gifts, gone forever.

Only the memories remain,

now gemstones, 

catastrophic carats

the color 

    and cut 

       and clarity of heartache.


…..And then, 

out of nowhere,

in the dark night of the soul

the bishop 

arrives on the scene

where Jean Valjean is 

under arrest for stealing silver, 

holds open a bag, 

sings,

“but my friend, 

you left so early

surely something slipped your mind…

you forgot I gave these, also

would you leave the best behind?”

And then, 

    dismissing the police…

       turns to Valjean,

           lowers his voice, 

                and sets the stage: 


“But remember this, my brother,

see in this some higher plan

you must use this precious silver

to become an honest man.

By the witness of the martyrs,

   by the passion and the blood,

God has raised you out of darkness

I have saved your soul for God.”


In a world where chains are broken, 

locks are picked, 

fire and rust consume,

water and wind ravage, 


what matters most is merciful love 

     in the human heart, 

          over-salved with 

                 the love of Christ 

who has forgiven all of us….

through prayer and the word,

through meditation and tears

that break down self 


so His love bursts through 

    hardened walls 


in truth and righteousness, 

with 

meekness 

and mercy 

and grace 

in a communion cup of blood

bigger than any Kool Aid man

   bursting through sheetrock

     offering the world

        a different-way-to-think-drink 


My son asked me,

“what would Miriam say?” 


and therein was the model

of forgiveness- 

    unconditional love, 

       at a time when 

        the tears of hurt 

           blurred 

             the windshield 

                of wisdom. 


My mother -

a grandmother 

who locked everything 

always 

would tell me to unchain 

my heart, 

take care of my daughter - 

a pearl in an oyster shell

because her heart in eternity 

matters more 

than the gold and diamonds 

that were not locked tightly in a “safe.”


Have faith in this some higher plan….” 

is how I forgave a theft and rejoice in the promise 




The Bible tells us to be thankful in all things. I gave thanks when a daughter came asking for help and confessing her addiction and theft - because as a mother who prays daily for the health and safety of my children and grandchildren, I can only rejoice when God hears and blesses me with answered prayer. He also revealed a path for her to enter a six month faith-based rehab and transition home in another state where we were able to Zoom with her on Christmas and see a smile again, emerging from the rubble. He used her sister in mighty ways to do His work. He remains at work, using her life for His purposes as we continue to pray for her as she goes through recovery. Please join us as we pray. Thanks be to God! The manger in our Nativity is a powerful reminder that the most important gifts of Christmas are not found under any tree. 







3 comments:

  1. Dear Kim... your words fill my heart. I rejoice with you on so many levels. The prodigal coming home. The welcoming with open arms. The anguish and the healing power (over time) of forgiveness. The wisdom of your son: "What would Miriam do?" The higher plan, oh yes, ALWAYS, for we see but tiny pieces and often only the broken ones...not how they all connect, somehow, some way, in God's overall glorious mosaic. One day not even the cracks will remain but for now, that's where the light comes in (to paraphrase Leonard Cohen). Both you and I wrote about the "dark night of the soul" today! And oh - Valjean. 24601. Redemption is my favorite theme of all. And that photo - it pierces my heart. My love and prayers are with you and your beloveds, my friend. Luke 1:37 <3

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  2. This was so powerful. I loved the ending stanzas. I am sorry for the pain but grateful for the lessons.

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  3. Oh, Kim, I marvel at your faith and grace. This time of year is so difficult for those who struggle w/ addiction. I honestly don’t know how you find the courage to be so open, to be so steadfast in your faith. Your poem burrows deep into the human soul through time, through human and natural disasters to find an anchor in a higher power. Hugs to you, my friend.

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